On Financial Domination

Financial domination, or “findom” as it’s largely known within the community, seems to be more popular than ever these days. Most of the professional Dommes and switches I come across engage in some form of financial domination on a regular basis. Generally, I find that this kind of control falls into one of two categories (keep in mind, I said generally – as with all things kink, the variations are vast).

Most typically, it involves a female (usually an extraordinarily pretty one) extorting money from a male submissive. This can happen in a lot of different ways. For instance, a man might wish to show his adoration and appreciation for the woman in question, and thus offer up various gifts or tokens of his affection. He might simply give her the money in tributes, gift cards or (my favorite) cold, hard cash. He might be required to hand over his credit card while the Domme goes on a shopping spree. I’ve even heard of more practical arrangements in which the slave is responsible for handling the woman’s bills, utilities, rent payments and what not. This might be intrinsic to the dynamic (meaning, it may be part of the males submission to the woman) or something he does to show her his gratitude for her time, attention and guidance.

Another, more rare form of financial domination involves the submissive handing over all of his earning to the Domme, allowing her to handle his expenses and dish out an occasional allowance to him (usually keeping the rest for herself). In this case, the slave would have absolutely no control over his own finances, allowing his Mistress to dominate every facet of his life. Bills would be paid with his money, but not by him and he would be required to ask permission from the Domme for each and every expenditure. Can you imagine calling your Mistress and politely asking it was alright to go out have a couple drinks with your friends, having to log every penny and report back to her in turn? What if she said no? I imagine this would keep a man very, very obedient.

Findom ranges from extreme and humiliating to sweet and playful. The motivations as to why someone would want to submit in this fashion are many, but certainly understandable. After all, money makes our world go round. What better way to offer up your submission and obedience to a person that to sacrifice what you work so very hard to achieve. While the act of being “used” for cash can be humiliating, it can always be a very intimate form of control.

Where do I fall in all of this? Good question.

I don’t necessarily consider myself a “FinDomme”. Meaning, what draws me to BDSM isn’t that particular activity, but I can certainly appreciate it and do engage in financial domination during sessions (both online and in person). As a girl, I love getting presents. Opening my mail and finding pretty little brown boxes with yummy little trinkets inside makes my day and certainly puts a smile on my face – but perhaps not for the reasons you think. While I love “stuff” (name one female alive who doesn’t enjoy a sexy pair of heels or designer jeans and I’ll show you a liar), what I love more is your appreciation and adoration. Getting gifts makes me happy but knowing you felt compelled to submit to me in such a way makes me even happier. That doesn’t mean I won’t rake you over the coals if that’s your fantasy, but watching you squirm happily/nervously while I do it is what really fills me with delight.



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This entry was posted on Friday, July 12th, 2013 at 1:42 pm and is filed under Blog. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

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